Rain in the springtime!

This morning I went out walking-a new start to the spring-I will exercise more. I even ran for approximately 2 minutes. It was drizzling and I had my iPod on. Shuffle does not bring up a lot of upbeat songs...then, again, maybe I don't have much upbeat music.

My little sister is relating her dreams to me. There were lions, but her bones saved her. And she ate her goldfish (ok, this is in real life, goldfish pretzles), because she did not find the booger that she thought was in there...I like to think that she is speaking metaphorically, but I don't know many 3 1/2 year olds that speak metaphorically.

She loves me. I love her. It is so simple.

Oh, I didn't mention the birds... they were all out chirping and singing away. Much better than the music on my iPod.

Have a good day~

Relationships

I have been thinking A LOT about relationships and I am as messed up as the next person about them. Probably more messed up. I have all of my baggage from a teenager and how I managed relationships. Then I have all of this "something-like-Christian-morals-but-not-really" bunch of "shoulds". Then I have all of this protectionism in me-protect my boundaries, take care of me, etc. How do I live like Christ? How do I become Christ-like? I think that found some interesting and true thoughts in the article by Rob Bell, that was a feature in the Single Connection and can be found here. I love Rob's writing style and his voice-convicting, yet very familiar. I think that even if you are not a Christian, that this article has some good stuff about relationships, not just romantic ones. I wonder what the world would look like if we lived this way, focused on giving rather than getting our needs met, which reminds me of a little article that was in Discipleship Journal a few months ago (but I will have to wait until it is available online or you can order back issues).

Hey and a quick shout out to Nick who told me about Velvet Elvis, which I thought was an excellent book by Mr. Bell-if anyone has to get rid of "brickianity" it is me!

Mission accomplished: clean bathroom!

I know this seems very strange, but I am quite happy that my bathroom is clean. I find that when my life seems to be spinning out of control it is the mundane things that get neglected and a dirty bathroom is nearly ungodly. Fortunately, I get into cleaning mode quickly. My room is next and I would continue through the entire house except that it is now 9:30ish and I want to go to bed in the next hour. Cleaning my bathroom gives me a definable sense of accomplishment. It takes rather little energy and I can do it. There are things that I can't do tonight-figure out my "career", start and finish my taxes, navigate the relational landmines that I fear will explode, figure out how to make my dad happy or engage with me on a healthy relational level (or all of the dad substitutes), etc. But, I can clean my bathroom. It's done.

I'm sure that in the next few days my energy will run out and I will be very grateful that I cleaned my bathroom tonight. Then I will have to rely on my friends a bit to cheer my up or just watch silly movies with me (Hitch, anyone?)!

But, for tonight, the bathroom is done. Maybe I can get the bedroom reasonably in order next. I need a house, I have too much stuff for one bedroom and the various boxes around my house!

Ying Yang

I have thought about so many things to blog about. Some were profound. Some were vengeful. Some were silly. So, I think I want to say that God is good or the universe is a good place...seeking balance. After a very confusing and frustrating and sleep deprived weekend, when I was about to write off all people of a certain gender, I had three significant interactions with my own gender that made me happy. 1) I ran into my best friend from middle and high school on the train. 2) My bookgroup met and I learned that although I sometimes feel like Daisy Miller, I am not as ill-fated as she is. 3) One of my college friends called and it was just encouraging.

And since, I have not written off all men and still talk to them, I have connected with the engaged guy that never calls (and he gave me some convicting truth), sushi with another friend (who truly is a friend and not a psuedo-friend), and countless other quick conversations that show that my experience was the weird one. And that maybe I just need to trust my instinct more.

Anyone up for 8 minute dating? Let's ask Captain Kurt...

The Harrowing Journey Home

What a bizarre day! I started this morning by going to a store to buy frames, at which point I lost all ability to make a decision and called my boss to ask her what she thought. They didn't really have what she wanted. So, I bought a nice frame, without a matt, thinking that the guy at work wanted to do his own. But, there was a nagging sense that I should have bought a back-up with the matt. After making my purchases, I walked quickly to the bread shop to get a bagel and coffee. I think that I overloaded on sugar. They have this wonderful cinnamon sugar bagel.

I have a pet peeve about places that are not really bagel places. The way to tell that a place is NOT really a bagel shop (or that they really just don't understand my needs) is that they give me a pre-cut bagel with the cream cheese on the side. This really makes NO sense to me at all, particularly when my bagel is ordered "to go". I mean, do they expect me to slather my bagel with cream cheese while I walk or in the car? It just does not make sense. Of course, the downside to the REAL bagel shop is that they consistently put too much cream cheese on my bagel. I have a tablespoon of cream cheese stuck in the hole, which is really too much to handle. So, I scrape it off on the paper and hope that the paper does not fly away as I drive...

Then I got to work and of course, the guy said that people normally buy one with a matt and we discussed the situation, with me saying that I would buy another frame and bring it in tomorrow. But, then he said that he would get a matt. At that point, I let it lay and went to my desk. The requests we instantaneous. I went throughout my day...

fast forward to lunch. BEAUTIFUL!!! I walk down the street and get a greek salad with chicken. It is all too salty, but I enjoy my sweet (too sweet, again) tea while sitting outside, text a few people, have a slightly surprising phone call with a friend, and go back to work.

fast forward to leaving, I leave the parking garage after trying my stumbling Swahili on the cashier. I have only just discovered that he is Kenyan yesterday and pieces of the language fall out of my mouth. Not a graceful fall, more of a stumble. I mix my words up and mumble. Of course, Spanish invades my brain. Then I exit, I turn left, turn right, turn right, avoid a stupid car, go down two blocks, avoid ANOTHER stupid car, turn right. Meandering down the street. I find myself to my turn again, this time to the left. I am in the second turn/straight lane in. The vehicle to my left, in a left turning lane ONLY, decides that the does not like that direction and speeds forward just as I am about to turn left. Inches from my car. I slam on my breaks and yell "shit" really loudly into my friend's ear and yet thanking God that I noticed that the car was not turning. Just for the record, I had my blinker on (don't you like the word "indicator" better than "blinker"?). Continued home. Just as I am getting on the parkway, I notice that a car is pulled over to the left and that the police officer is standing at his car, I encourage the brakes to slow me down, although I am not going very fast and I am in the far right lane. As I slow down, the car on my right speeds up and we watch the police officer wave him in. I always have wondered about that...how do you know that they are waving you to the side and is it not more dangerous to be slowing down in the middle lane and getting one lane over to stop. It seems far more dangerous than going 10 miles over the speed limit. I'm just not sure about the techniques of such operations.

Truly, I was getting a little anxious by that point, so much that I mised my exit down the road, had to go over a bridge and get back on before a toll road. I think that's when I noticed that I was not paying attention. My mystical inclinations lead me to think that all of these near misses are God trying to get my attention. Of course, the fact that I avoided the potential accidents might speak to the fact that I was aware. But, I slowed down none the less and thought more clearly as I went home. I talked to myself, as one does, about a variety of things-potential new friends, crazy drivers, what I need to do when I get home...what might I blog....

Can't get to sleep or "why do I have a headache?"

I get into these little frenzies of doing things on the internet. Tonight, I created a myspace account, which you can find easily, I think. I chatted with my friend Katie, who has an adorable boyfriend. I invited my bro-in-law to myspace account. I found out that Imago Dei is having Taize services for lent-but they have a lecture.

I had a conference call with the regional guy for Wycliffe-they'll have a banquet out here in April. I love Wycliffe. I want everyone to have the opportunity to have the Bible in their language. We have so much "Christian literature" and yet so many westerners are Biblically illiterate...and yet are we so narcissistic that we wallow and do nothing...ok, so not so great musings...I get a little cranky when I think about this stuff. I should do more. Goodnight!