Ode to the guitar

Oh, fragile thing of wood and string
Melodies resonate from the touch of the metal by the flesh
fragile bowed wood that can be crushed by the banging on the floor by the lead of Arcade Fire
or coaxed to make sound inexplicable

The quick beat of the drum
The piano tickled
Gourd

We sit in the room, myself almost the youngest
I tap my feet, cross my legs, uncross
I hear the sounds of Brazil, of Africa
reminding me of travels taken and untaken
the past and the future

Why do I leave my guitar in the corner
waiting to be played?


This is the worst ode ever

Screen Free Night

I'm starting to think that I need one of these!! Ack-I'm addicted to Facebook. Did you know I just found a friend from when I was 16 in another country? This is so bad for me-not finding the person, but the whole thing. Still can't get a stupid pic up. I tried taking a pic with my phone and sending to my hotmail e-mail so I could upload it, but it wouldn't send.

Oh, well, to bed I go. But, tomorrow, I will write an ode to the guitar...

Music Addict

I don't know what has happened to me. I am sucking up music like it is going out of style. It's the e-music thing, really. I was waiting and waiting for the turn over of the month to finish downloading Belle & Sebastian's The Life Pursuit. Then I had to download Rodrigo y Gabriela, who are not Brazilian as I had previously stated but Mexican. LOVE them! They are coming to 9:30 Club June 30th, I think. I really want to see them, but we shall see. My sister said I could also visit that weekend.

I still have 22 gigs on my iPod. I should download more podcasts to listen to, but I really need to get some device that will allow me to play my iPod on my car stereo. I am, for some odd reason, more likely to listen to talking people in the car. If it is preaching, I might say "amen" or "true that" (in my white suburban way) too much in public and that would be embarassing. Or, what is truly more likely, I might start a running commentary out loud in response to what I am hearing. In church, I can write my comments down, which are usually in paranthesis and consist of (Oh, really, must check on dates when synagogues were regulary attended) or (Do they really think that homosexuals are breaking up marriages or perhaps could divorce from hetero affairs be more prevalent) or other smart aleck remarks made in my turned-up-nose voice. But, if I am listening on the train, then I might just say something aloud. Of course, there are enough crazy people on the train that I might just fit right in....

Fairtrade Coffee at Sam's Club??

So, there I was, pushing my gargantuan shopping cart, filled with dixie paper cups and paper plates and dessert paper plates, all in coordinating khaki rope-looking edging, along with my coffee cups and my garbage bags. I looked like I was shopping for a very large household of screaming kids and caffeinated parents, cause that's all that keeps them going. And there, lo and behold, was a huge 2.5 lb. bag of Sam's Club "Fairtrade" coffee-espresso roast no less. I thought, wow they are really getting on board. I mean if Sam's club can do it, then maybe my church could go fairtrade! I know that is a terrible thought to think...basing a social justice action on a mega wholesale company's products is probably not very coherent! Then I looked at the price. It was less than the non-fairtrade Starbuck's brand coffee. Which makes me very suspicious for some reason. Why is that? And why couldn't I rejoice in this small victory of the world becoming a better place (still yet to be determined whether this coffee is truly fairtrade). What cynicism resides in me to crush hope??!!! Do I just enjoy my soapbox that much (the truth is yes, I truly like my railing position upon the melting soap box)? Anyways, does anyone know anything? Is it truly fairtrade?? You can't find a pic online: http://www.samsclub.com/shopping/navigate.do?dest=5&item=351220. I'm curious as to how Sam's club fairtrade coffee is less expensive than Starbuck's and who the supplier is.

Morality

So, my friend, Jake, and I were sitting at the Dolphin show tonight discussing "what is moral?" or "what determines what is moral behavior?". I'm throwng this out for response, because I really believe that deep down at the root, "morality" is determined by culture. Now there can be many good and true things, and equally bad things, from my perspective, which can be considered moral or immoral. Or there can be concepts. such as "murder" that can be considered "immoral" and therefore punishable by law and community. However, "murder" itself is not an act but a category of crime, which then a society chooses to prohibit. "Killing" is an act that can be determined as "murder" or not. What makes up "murder" is determined by the society. For instance, there is law/community/government that says certain kinds of "killing" are legal. Killing in war is legal (within certain bounds). Killing unborn fetuses is legal (within certain bounds). Killing animals is legal (within certain bounds). However, the "killing" of one private civilian of another is generally not legal and therefore is punishable, sometimes by another legal "killing".

In somes way, I do not believe that we can legislate morality and usually when I am saying such things, I am referring to some sort of religious ethic being taught through government means, or laws on adultery. Civil laws should be support civil society. The problem seems to be that our laws allow more permissiveness in a culture that does not practice restraint. So, it would be great to have a capitalist economic system if people had a socialist ethic, in which they considered the common good above their own (one might argue that this follows a mandate to "love one another as yourself").

Morality truly is a behavior I think, that rises out of belief. For instance, many religious women voluntarily or under compulsion, wear headcoverings (Jewish, Muslim and Christian). In their culture it is moral to cover oneself out of modesty-preserving men from temptation, or a symbol of being under correct authority, honoring themselves, or perhaps even honoring tradition. Therefore a woman in that sub-culture or culture, who does not exhibit this behavior would be thought to be immoral. If I enter that culture, I might cover my head out of respect, particularly to the women. But, also as a Christian, I believe in freedom. Paul talks about a woman's hair being her head-covering. I am also concerned that men should feel liberality with their judgment of women, or that they do not have to guard their hearts (if the hair thing is really causing a problem). I personally, am more concerned that women are not objectified because it debases both men and women. It promotes violence against those that do not adher to the behavior, as well as disdain, which undermine a reality that I believe goes far beyond the behavior or morality issue, which is that I believe humanity (men and women) is made in the image of God. We bear the stamp something very good. I hesitate to say divine because that gets messy. But, it is something more than just dust to dust. Therefore, I am called to treat people as their better self and not degrade them. So, I try not to objectify myself or manipulate others. But, this flows out of a deeper truth than "it is good to be moral" or the pragmaticism of civil society.

Anyways, these are just some thoughts. I don't want to be involved in arguements over morality. It is too divergent in this world. But maybe respect is a good place to start.

Thoughts?

Taxes done...

Whew! They are done and despite the fact that I made so little money last year, I still owed. Dangit! Oh well, it is just money and life goes on! I'm so glad to have that done.

Christians for Biblical Equality Blog

I know that some of you do not like links and just want to hear what I have to say (how flattering!!??!) but I did want to bring attention to the CBE blog on my links list on the left. I like CBE. I'm reading Men and Women in the Church by Sarah Sumner right now, too, which is written in this wonderful gracious (even slightly whimsical) fashion.

The most recent blog hits a great note, because often the church (particularly evangelical) is lagging behind social justice movements or adopting a secular theory and trying to make it fit with our theology. But, I think this latest blog points out (dare I say "convicts") that this should not be the case. My theology is sufficient to esteem all men and women as being equal-not only equal, but desperately needed in a hurting world- and gifteded. When my theology and anthropology is not sufficient, I am probably not reading my Bible or being quiet enough to hear the Holy Spirit. I am probably letting the voice of my own fears and the "church" (who is "they" anyway) crowd out what my heart knows.

And I might be single for the rest of life because of this theology, but at least I have the hope of wholeness and the faith that God loves me and has called me. Not trying to be a man and not being told how to be a deficient woman. (please note, this blog is not written in bitterness, but a hint of sarcasm might have been sprinkled on that last sentence)

Tax time!

I can't believe that I have let my taxes go this far. I can't remember the last time that I did this. But, it will be very gratifying when I finish (hopefully tonight). So, here's hoping...ask me tomorrow!

Friends are good mood changers

So, I was really crabby after work today and I almost called my friend to tell her that she might not want me over for dinner because of my mood. But, I forgot, and talked to friends for my entire ride home on the light rail and my drive to her house. Then I got to her house and was ok. Then, after about an hour, she told me that she had been in a cranky mood and had almost called me to warn me. But, we were both in great spirits by that point.

So, my point is, friends (real friends) are great! It doesn't matter how you are feeling-there's no pretension. And your mood can truly change and it can be a constructive night.

And now it is midnight and I am too awake to sleep. And I don't have to work tomorrow morning, so I think that I will go read my book, something about men and women in the church and concensus in leadership. I will have a post about that later.

You know, I was even in a bad mood about Easter (how stupid is that) before tonight. I just felt that I had not taken enough space/time to contemplate the nature of the season. I had been too consumed with other things (Lord, forgive me). Maybe my mood needs to be sacrificed.

Is my imagery getting too churchy? Ick.

Where's the feminine voice in the Emergent Movement?

I love a lot of writers that have been labeled "Emergent"-McLaren, Miller, Bell...Do you see the pattern emerging (heehee)? Where are all the women? There's Lauren F. Winner, who I have not actually read (except in DJ), although I have seen her speak at Oasis.

Of course, there is Kathleen Norris, auther of the Cloister Walk and Amazing Grace. I do not know that she would align herself with the Emergent Church. I saw her name before I heard the term. But, I feel that emergents would have much to listen to in her words. I finally finished Amazing Grace. I must have started it a couple of years ago, since my book marker was the program was from my sister's wedding (not the younger one...the wedding back in July of 2004). I read the sections, savoring each like manna. At least I could reread those words, for they did not disappear after a day. Sweet to my soul. There is a particular part, near the end of the book, where she writes about her husband, who has not embraced the Christian faith. He's a poet but worshipper of reason. Her writings are comforting to me. I have questions about God's guidance in our life and what life is about.

But, thinking upon this to a greater extent. It is not just the here and now. Our lives are eternal-not a chronological line. In the gospel of John, there is a lot of reference to "eternal life" and many people concentrate on the escatalogical (their understanding of heaven, hell, future understanding) perspective of this. But, I have also read other commentators and I see that this fits in the context of the words, that "eternal" is also abundant life. Life to the fullest. It is like my one friend says, we only have one life to make a difference, make the world a better place. I would rather live this life in abundance. Living it to the fullest. Not fullness in the busy sense. That's just busy...but rich in good things. Not materials things to distract me (although I do enjoy beauty manifested by the creative productivity of human hands). So, what is my point?? I'm not sure that I have one. These are just a bit of slightly connected thoughts. You know, I breathed such a sigh of relief when I read a little of Virgina Wolf and learned of an actual style of writing that's name has escaped me...because I have an awful headache.

Well, I have been listening to an awful (using the word "awful" makes me feel like Anne of Green Gables) lot of Switchfoot lately...more on that to come. In the meantime, check out www.emergingwomen.blogspot.com. What do you think about the poem posted by Kate?

So, I don't know if I should really publish this...but here goes.

6 miles, asphalt and tevas

Apparently, my tevas do not provide enough cushioning on the outer part of my foot as I would like. So those little parts are hurting and I must have spent some time cramping up my back somehow (which I realized today has not hurt since I got my new mattress set around Christmas). So, I think some yoga is in order before bedtime to work out a few of the kinks.

That being said, the weather was crisp and gorgeous, the scenery beautiful and the company excellent. So, all in all, yesterday was a good day!

Oh, and the mystery of the dissapearing bowl was solved-my fellow pottery student had mistaken my mishapen bowl for her own, but found her's upon further investigation and left mine untrimmed. So, I was able to trim my bowl and glaze my very small piece. I'm calling them all "pieces" because they are not necessarily well shaped vessels which could be identified with the form of a bowl or pot or anything. Maybe I should just keep making these pieces and then use them to grow little terrariums. I don't know. I have decided to postpone my next pottery class because I will miss too many classes and I want to go visit friends and have vacation. But, I will start back up in the autumn, I think. Watch-out you could all receive mugs for Christmas!