Post-Thanksgiving Anxiety

Well, the end of Thanksgiving weekend heralds the beginning of the Christmas season and then the New Year. I spent most of this week sick with the cold from not-a-nice place. I am still fighting off its effects.

However, it was a nice week otherwise. My sister from FL came to visit this weekend. She was "babysitting" my little sister who lives here. So, we had lots of "sister" moments with the little one hitting us on our butts and telling us that we are her sisters. She thinks that everyone has sisters a couple decades older than they are. Funny....we try to explain that a babysitter is not necessarily a sibling....

So, I want to get back to my writing about my friends. My ex, who I wrote briefly about in the last post called me up to let me know that he thought my post was innacurate-our relationship did not start slow....of course, it took years for him to make a move. It was a fast move, though! So, I suppose that I stand corrected in one aspect, but I am still right from my perspective.

My PT anxiety stems from the fact that I am procrastinating with life. I know that I want to go to grad school, but I am not sure what to study. I know that I need to take the GRE for some courses of study. Top that off with a heavy dose of feeling age creep up on me and I end up with anxiety. I feel like all of the things that I learned while reading "Ruthless Trust" have fallen quickly to the wayside. So, I suppose that I am going to pick myself up, realize that I have time. Time to be. Today I was told that I was loved for who I was/am. My rational self screams against this. And yet, that is all that I want. Not to be loved for my perceived "goodness", or my lofty dreams, my silliness, or even my exellent cooking skills (which are highly debatable). I have nothing to say at this point.